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Is It Common for Siblings to Fight Over Inheritance?

Your Personal Family Lawyer for Life

When there's bad blood over an inheritance, you can challenge the trustee—but try talking first.

Unfortunately, siblings refusing to speak with other siblings about their late parent’s estate matters is a fairly common occurrence. A recent article from Morningstar, “My brother won’t tell me anything about our mother’s $1.6 million estate. Can I remove him as trustee?” provides a good example of how things can go wrong.

According to a letter to the publication from one brother, a mother was the second to die and the brother who knows about her will has not yet filed the will with the court. To make matters more complicated, he explains that the father had created a trust before he died in 2000, which was never funded. Medicaid paid for $150,000 in nursing home costs, and at the time of her death, the mother owned a 1.6-million-dollar property.

While the best resolution is almost always simply to have a direct conversation, this doesn’t seem likely to occur in this situation. The controlling brother may be doing precisely what is necessary. However, since the brother won’t tell the other brother what is happening, the only way forward may be to go to court.

If a trust was created, it’s entirely possible it was a Medicaid Asset Protection Trust (MAPT). This trust is created to remove assets from being countable for Medicaid purposes. If the trust wasn’t funded, the $1.6 million property may never have been retitled and placed in the trust. This is the second most common estate planning mistake seen by estate planning attorneys; the first is not having an estate plan.

If the trust was never funded, the family home is considered an asset by Medicaid and could be “clawed back” by Medicaid to cover the medical expenses. If the $150,000 were the father’s nursing home costs, the father’s estate would have owned this amount, which should have taken place after the father’s estate was settled. There is a statute of limitations, however, and depending on the rules of the father’s state, this may be a moot point.

Since the house was the primary residence of a well-spouse, it may not have been countable for Medicaid. If the father had no other assets, there may be no debt to Medicaid. It’s entirely possible all this was dealt with. However, the brother wasn’t told the details.

This leaves the question of what the brother is doing with the mother’s estate. If no will has been filed, it might be because the estate plan was designed to avoid probate. Assets held in trusts and passed through beneficiary designations don’t go through probate. If the house was placed in a trust, it would not go through probate either.

However, since the sibling is an heir, he has the right to an accounting report or a report from the brother as the trustee and executor. The report should contain information on how assets were owned, and distributions were made.

This is a lesson for parents who know their children don’t get along. If they don’t get along while you are living, don’t expect this to change after your death. If one is given power of attorney, serves as a trustee and executor, and the others are left out of any decision-making, your estate may shrink because of litigation, and the family may fracture. Talk with your estate planning attorney about naming a neutral person for all or some of these roles to avoid adding the stress of an estate battle to your family’s grief.

Proper estate planning can keep your family out of conflict, out of court, and out of the public eye. If you’re ready to create a comprehensive estate plan, contact us to schedule your Family Wealth Planning Session. Even if you already have a plan in place, we will review it and help you bring it up to date to avoid heartache for your family. Schedule online today.

Reference: Morningstar (Aug. 3, 2024) “My brother won’t tell me anything about our mother’s $1.6 million estate. Can I remove him as trustee?”

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